What Eugene Taught Me
When I first met Eugene, he had been a peer mediator for several years in his South Bronx high school. Once, when he was asked by his teacher to think about a goal he had for himself in the future, he had said, "To be alive at twenty-one." He was eighteen years old at the time. A year after he graduated, I got a telephone call from his principal telling me that Eugene had been in the "wrong place at the wrong time" and had been hit by a random bullet while standing on a street corner in his neighborhood. He was in Metropolitan Hospital, paralyzed from the waist down. It took me two days to get up enough courage to visit him.
As I walked into the hospital ward that day, I saw a disheartening sight -- overy thirty young men in wheelchairs, many of them victims of violence that plagued our city. I spotted Eugene immediately. I asked him, "How are you doing?" I will never forget his response. He said, "I wasn't doing too great until this morning, when I got up and decided to find the place in my heart that could forgive the guy that pulled the trigger." Almost speechless, I managed to ask, "How were you able to do that?" He replied, "I realized that I could have been that guy if I didn't know there was a better way."
The compassion and insight that Eugene displayed that day is still the exception, not the norm, but it has inspired me to think further about how to foster such resilience and courage in our young people and how we can make these exceptions in students' and teachers' lives more widespread.
--Linda Lantieri, in Schools With Spirit
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12 Past Reflections
On Apr 8, 2010 Swapan Kr.Haldar wrote :
I would like to add the following lines from DALAILAMA in my previous reflection of "WHAT EUGENE TAUGHT ME".
How mind work when one learn the "better way" and work on the path.
If we have a positive mental attitude, then even when surrounded by hostility, we shall not lack inner peace. On the other hand, if our mental attitude is more negative, influenced by fear, suspicion, helplessness, or self-loathing, then even when surrounded by our best friends, in a nice atmosphere and comfortable surroundings, we shall not be happy.---DALAILAMA
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On Apr 7, 2010 Swapan Kr.Haldar wrote :
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On Apr 6, 2010 Pancho wrote :
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On Apr 2, 2010 Linda Lantieri wrote :
I am grateful that more of you out there have now read this story. Eugene continues to be an inspirataion to me and makes me keep being committed to giving young people the skills and dispositions they really need to be successful in life - the ones that prepare them for the tests of life instead of what young people feel today - that school for them is a "life of tests". May we continue to have the courage to widen our vision of education that young people like Eugene are taught skills in social and emotional learning as a regular part of the curriculum.
Peace,
Linda Lantieri
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On Apr 2, 2010 Ramanand Kowta wrote :
What courage ! hats off ! May his tribe flourish !
Forgiveness and Gratitude lead you towards ' service with humility ' .Only then does surrender to and the acceptance of the Oneness of LIFE happen !
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On Apr 1, 2010 Somik Raha wrote :
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On Mar 30, 2010 Evetta Hines wrote :
As I read this story, it pulled at my heart strings. Having the courage to brave through any adversity is admirable. Having the heart to forgive someone who caused the adversity is priceless.
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On Mar 30, 2010 Isabel wrote :
I feel good when I read this story. I agree that it is a question of resilience and, the good news is that resilience is something that can be learned. It is about having values AND it is about learning to thrive through bad experiencies in a constructive way. How important it is to have both of them. Love,
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