Destiny is Within Us

Unfortunately, I had a bad experience on this matter…
Last week, I saw the one with who I’m in love and we were together for about two hours in the same bus, but I didn’t say even a word to her as I haven’t talked to her yet… I should have broken the silence between us and had talked to her for the first time but...
I’ve been waiting the destiny does something in order to make it to happen, to make a condition in which I could talk to her, to create a circumstance by which we would have a chance to interact with each other, I mean she has a tendency to talk as well. However, there were some times that when I come to think of it, I notice it helped me, it created some situations that I could talk to her, like the one in the bus, it hasn’t done or created a great opportunity for me and I think it won’t do it and I have to do something about it…
*Although waiting for fate to do something for you is ridiculous, I’ve been doing this for about nine months…

 Abhi, your post resonated with me. Winks. 

The author's anecdote (anything one can share, really) is an observation of what's going on at the level of form. Where is the rest of the story? What really matters in this moment of choice is the invisible landscape within. THAT is where choice comes from, in my experience. 

On on the level of external phenomena, the bus arriving early doesn't *mean* anything: it could be that public transport or timeliness isn't happening this morning (because the run doesn't necessarily guarantee he would catch his ride) or it could be that this was a morning to sprint and feel the rush of wind and bouncing organs and drumming heartbeat. For people who follow the universe's lead in a graceful dance (the ones who catch the "winks") the meaning comes from the inside-- depending on what there is on the inside which is invisible and largely untapped. 

I've had moments when I truly feel there are no boundaries between our there and in me... but I'm VERY clear that if indeed I am the universe, I remain a mystery onto myself. So the question, for me, might be: ok this is happening, where is the invitation to aliveness? If I wasn't looking forward to arriving at a particular time for a particular reason (this is the invisible landscape I'm talking about, maybe I have been yearning for a time to just sit and be) I would smile and slow down deliberately. If, on the other hand I DO want to reach my destination this question of aliveness, of what would light me up right now? might be a delicious sprint. 

I think the primary job is to make the undetected felt in the body. Where is my highest expression right now yields a clear and empowered step in this dance with (our own?)Mystery. 

 We make choices in life from the time we wake up and the time we go to bed. Certain behaviors are habitual which do not require my conscious choice making. There are situations which warranty choice making.If I do not make a wise choice and act accordingly, I miss the bus and regret after words, blame myself or blame the other or come up with a an explanation like it was not meant to happen, it was not destined to be.

I have learned that it is  up to me to make my choice. I have freedom to make my choice and I am accountable for the outcomes of my choice. I have prostate cancer. Of course the first choice I  made was to look for a competent oncologist and consulted him. He mentioned the right conventional medical treatment for me. I read more about it and decided to go along with his recommendation. I also read about what causes prostate cancer , scientific research done by renowned researchers in the filed. I have made radical changes in my diet and life style. I have been able to control the growth and spread of the cancer.By making wise choices I am shaping my destiny.

I use mindfulness paradigm for making wise choices when I encounter situations that have the potential for causing pain and suffering. And even when I go through emotional pain, I mindfully process my emotions and arrive at peace within me. I have learned not to react and not to blame others and not to hold onto the past which is already gone.

I find the Serenity Prayer authored by the American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr very illuminating. 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

May we cultivate wisdom  by the light within  to make wholesome choices that do not hurt us and others in our life!

Namaste.

Jagdish P Dave

Destiny is within us gives us some liberation from circumstances, situations and even other people. If we view our life as a series of choices over which we have control then we may feel more empowered. We cannot control how other people act, we can't always control the circumstances we presently are in, loss of a job through downsizing, but as stated we can control how we react. A recent experience in my own work life: the department for which I worked as a storytelling consultant at the World Bank was dismantled and dissolved after nearly 50 years in existence. There was a lot of hurt. I was one of the newer staff, but at first I was caught up in the "injustice" of it after all we were doing really good and valuable work, how could this be happening? Then I was caught up in fear: as a Freelance Storyteller and Speaker I would once again have to search for other work which is often seeking for 3 to 6 months for a one or two day gig; takes a lot of energy! Then i shifted my focus: what did I have control over? My own response! I could look at this as a huge gift! I had been given 18 months of job security after 9 years of instability, I could buy cheese! I could also pursue presenting keynotes at places like Colorado Coalition for the Homeless. Wow! Instead of feeling drained, I felt energized and excited and hopeful. Developing this awareness is about shifting to "what can I control? How can I respond?" And "I have a choice."  Hugs to each of us!