My understanding is Schlessman is saying we can come from memnoon which is the gift of asking someone to do something they want to do or we can give self empathy that we can't get to memnoon. We do have those choices. I felt blest by the request to talk about something bothering me that I wasn't talking about and wanted to. I don't only give out of memnoon. What would help me to only give out of memnoon if I were to do that is caring that the other gets what he or she wants and paying enough attention to the other to know what he or she wants and then give the gift of asking the person to do that. I don't operate that way. I value what is good for me or for the other more than what I or the other want. What a person wants and what is good for the person may or may not be the same. I like when I help the other to know what is good for him or her and support the person to do that.
On Mar 19, 2022 David Doane wrote :