What we see in the other is often more about us than about the other. Alcoholics Anonymous says, 'you spot it, you got it.' As someone said, there's something about that guy I can't stand in myself. We project ourselves onto others, especially our own negative traits. Maybe 25 years ago, I very much hurt a good friendship by my negative judgments and criticisms that had much more to do with me than my good friend, and I'm still sad about the hurt I caused to both of us. I see such happeningsas mistakes of judgment and projections, and I catch them best and before they are expressed outwardly by knowing it's valuable for me to examine what my judgment has to do with me, not with the other. It helps me to remember the times I expressed my negative judgments that caused me and the other hurt. It helps that I've learned that as I look at the other I see me, and to remind myself of that. It helps me to think before I speak.
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On Aug 23, 2021a wrote :
Wisdom David! I have to try to remember and utilize this wise truth. Thank you very much friend!
On Aug 21, 2021 David Doane wrote :