Substituting One Cruelty For Another

Anthony de Mello is too absolute for me. No one has got to do anything. It does usually help to know who you are, such as to know what your purpose in taking action is. The hungry may benefit more from food given in love, but they also benefit from food given by someone who is angry or condescending or trying to get praise, and the person giving it may benefit also. Both your action and your being count and shape your experience. Regarding the statement that a person can't decide until awake -- people do decide when not awake. When awake, a personmay or may not know what to do. Awake, a person can act out of his or her experience, heart, and best judgment as to what is best in a situation. I think Jesus' statement is about his commitment to action that he judged to be right in the moment, and he wasn't trying to produce a particular outcome in the future. No doubt that we see through our experience. We see things not as they are but as we are. When you change, everything changes. It was a long time ago that I began to become aware of being in the doing -- it happened as I became more aware of my being -- being is typically more difficult to know than doing. What helps me avoid the substitution trap is awareness. Before action, especially when upset, I've learned tooften ask myself what it is that I want to accomplish by my action, and if my intent is cruel, I'm pleased when I restrain myself.

Totally agree with you! Very well said. Thanks for the post!

It is true that if we give food to someone , it may not really matter to him whether we are giving food to him with love or just to satisfy our ego. Then the question would come is why are we giving food to another . Are we feeding the poor to satisfy our ego or are we serving a less privileged person with food , just as a calling of our inner self to share the goodness we have received and express gratitude for the privileges we have received in life.
The same activity of serving food , when done with love, will definetelygive afeeling of being wanted and respected to the other and at the same time will lead to a true satisfaction and a resultant inner transformation in us,