Listening deeply to someone means to be fully attentive to the other person's saying. Sounds simple, but not that easy to do. When I listen to someone my mind is fresh, clean, open and undivided. I am fully present with the other person. If and when an urge arises in me to talk, I hold my tongue and just listen. Listening to the other person deeply and fully requires self-discipline.
My friend and I are teaching Science of Happiness to Middle School and High School students. Yesterday we were exploring the topic of social connection as an important component ofhappiness. We were discussing how deep listening is a significant building block for creating and sustaining happy and healthy relationships. We have a very quiet and a very smart student in our class. He sits by himself reading a book of his choice. One of his class mates empathically and compassionately looked at him and asked him to say what makes him sit apart from others. The quiet student felt the other student'sgenuine curiosity and compassion. He opened his mind and heart and shared his sad experience of being criticized and humiliated by his friends. Deep listening opened the door for him to talk openly and honestly. He felt at home.
For me, there are two ways for cultivating deep listening. First is to listen to my self deeply and compassionately. It is self-introspection and self examination. This mindfulness listening helps me to cultivate the skill of listening to others deeply and compassionately. Deep listening is a gift to me and to others in my life.
Namaste!
JagdishP Dave
On Jan 31, 2020 Jagdish P Dave wrote :
My friend and I are teaching Science of Happiness to Middle School and High School students. Yesterday we were exploring the topic of social connection as an important component ofhappiness. We were discussing how deep listening is a significant building block for creating and sustaining happy and healthy relationships. We have a very quiet and a very smart student in our class. He sits by himself reading a book of his choice. One of his class mates empathically and compassionately looked at him and asked him to say what makes him sit apart from others. The quiet student felt the other student'sgenuine curiosity and compassion. He opened his mind and heart and shared his sad experience of being criticized and humiliated by his friends. Deep listening opened the door for him to talk openly and honestly. He felt at home.
For me, there are two ways for cultivating deep listening. First is to listen to my self deeply and compassionately. It is self-introspection and self examination. This mindfulness listening helps me to cultivate the skill of listening to others deeply and compassionately. Deep listening is a gift to me and to others in my life.
Namaste!
JagdishP Dave