I appreciate the author's question of "What do I really need to be happy?" It's an important one. What I need is to love, which I think includes connection and kindness. When I love I am connected and kind. I emphasize that what I need to be happy is to love, not to be loved. I have loved and had times of abiding in love, and have experienced being happy during those times. I have been loved, and that's a positive experience, but I'm not necessarily happy in receiving it or as a result of receiving it. There have been many times when I have been loved when I have not been happy. It is clear to me that I can be loved without my being happy or it generating my being happy. I don't think I can love without being happy -- I never have. Loving generates happiness. To love is to be happy. The ultimate is to love and be loved, but to love is the sine qua non. I think you know you are looking for happiness in the right places and right ways if you feel happiness that feels true and is abiding.
On Aug 11, 2013 david doane wrote :
I appreciate the author's question of "What do I really need to be happy?" It's an important one. What I need is to love, which I think includes connection and kindness. When I love I am connected and kind. I emphasize that what I need to be happy is to love, not to be loved. I have loved and had times of abiding in love, and have experienced being happy during those times. I have been loved, and that's a positive experience, but I'm not necessarily happy in receiving it or as a result of receiving it. There have been many times when I have been loved when I have not been happy. It is clear to me that I can be loved without my being happy or it generating my being happy. I don't think I can love without being happy -- I never have. Loving generates happiness. To love is to be happy. The ultimate is to love and be loved, but to love is the sine qua non. I think you know you are looking for happiness in the right places and right ways if you feel happiness that feels true and is abiding.