You Carry Your Wound

Such wise words...!

They remind me of an encounter I had very recently with a man who got raped while in police custody for one night; raped by his fellow prisoners. I met him a few days after, and we had long chat about the wound he'd received that night.

He is aware of hs wound; and he is determined to make sure the wounding stops with him, by accepting it with al the courage a man can muster.

"Total acceptance."

Is there anything more courageous than that?

Anything more daring? Anything riskier to the ego?

They key to liberty. But often so difficult to find.

Thank you for this wonderful post!

Aernout, Cape Town, South Africa

OK, I have read through all of Pancho's excellent comment on "what happens when we are wounded."

 I understand NOTHING about what is being said, but I would like to know. Yes, I am alive and my body/mind has somehow managed to come together enough so that I am not dead, but after so many attacks and wounds that are continually re-opened, none have healed. I am nothing but a mass of scars, as a person who was burned alive. This is the legacy I live with. What does "love" have to do with this? 

How to "love" the people who threw me into the fire?

Other people may "throw us in the fire", however , do we have the choice to stay in the fire or get out of the fire?  

 Of course we don't have to stay in the fire, and obviously if we survive, we have climbed out. But the question is directed towards how to find peace and healing when you are covered with scars for the rest of your life. Even if you successfully manage to avoid those people in the future, knowing that they are ready to throw bombs or wish you dead with any contact at all, for any reason at all, means the wounds are never able to really heal. And when you accept an invitation to "resolve things," and they use that as another opportunity to attack, all wounds are broken open anew.

So, the choice of "staying in the fire or getting out of the fire" only addresses that one incident. Not all the years that follow and how to heal from years and years of damage and heartache. "Forgiveness" doesn't take all the pain away, either, knowing that there is a group of people out there that want you DEAD. When it's "family" that is supposed to love and protect each other above all others, then what do you do? What do you say?

"I forgive you and stay away from me for the rest of my life?" What kind of healing is that?

All these answers I read sound so simple in their generalities, but trying to apply them to real incidents is where I get lost.