Hi, my name is phil, and i would just like to say a few words about life through my eyes.I am forty three and I have mental health problems for 20 years, and have been in a black hole more than once. After growing up with trauma and severe Personalty disorder, and depressive disorder, my life has seemed not woth living, and have knocked on heavens door many times. Low self asteem and severe times of depression, made my outlook on life not worth living. My memory is so bad now, that i cant remember what ive done the day before, or what day it is. this has impacted my life even more, and im on a section 117, in the community for the last five years. Six months ago, i had two hernina operations, afterwords my closest friend in my life who was there for me unconditnly, as i was for her, many times before, she took care orf me during my recovery. Six months ago, i found her after takin her own life, and yet again my life was turned upside down. Until then i never felt pain like it, or even thought about the affects it would have on the loved ones left behind. My heart has been broken, but the loss of my solemate, touched a part of me that now makes me think of how it would affect the people in my life, if i was not alive. I have started to accept my greif and pain, I only hope i can try and move on with my life, and remember the affects it has had on me, and her family. I hope it will make me think differently at the low points of my existance. Phil
On Mar 31, 2009 Philip Doggett wrote :
Hi, my name is phil, and i would just like to say a few words about life through my eyes.I am forty three and I have mental health problems for 20 years, and have been in a black hole more than once. After growing up with trauma and severe Personalty disorder, and depressive disorder, my life has seemed not woth living, and have knocked on heavens door many times. Low self asteem and severe times of depression, made my outlook on life not worth living. My memory is so bad now, that i cant remember what ive done the day before, or what day it is. this has impacted my life even more, and im on a section 117, in the community for the last five years. Six months ago, i had two hernina operations, afterwords my closest friend in my life who was there for me unconditnly, as i was for her, many times before, she took care orf me during my recovery. Six months ago, i found her after takin her own life, and yet again my life was turned upside down. Until then i never felt pain like it, or even thought about the affects it would have on the loved ones left behind. My heart has been broken, but the loss of my solemate, touched a part of me that now makes me think of how it would affect the people in my life, if i was not alive. I have started to accept my greif and pain, I only hope i can try and move on with my life, and remember the affects it has had on me, and her family. I hope it will make me think differently at the low points of my existance. Phil