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The ego is always more or less alone since it is the boundary we set up to define ourselves. The extent to which we feel alone-- or try to avoid feeling alone-- is a good indicator of how often we identify with our ego. Initially it seems that stepping out of this is a feat of imagination, yet we know that our 'togetherness' is a true fact at every level. The non-human cells outnumber the human ones on & in the thing I call 'my body' by 10-to-1. Every cubic meter of air contains 50 carbon molecules that have literally been the body of every single person alive on earth at this very moment. What was the body of all living beings enter my own body with each breath, and are in turn eventually touched by each breath of mine. When we consider the great beings like Jesus and the Buddha, what are they if not ones whose consciousness is wholly merged with a basic substrate of all consciousness itself? The great love or compassion that they are is also in us, even if we are only able to barely access a drop love or compassion within our own egoic consciousness. There is often an unfortunate mantra in Western culture that says 'fake it til you make it' -- even though faking it is actually a disastrous dangerous and painful path to making it. Yet in this case, imagining that we are together with many beneficent being, including the great ones, is not faking it. Its more like 'making it til we Make It,' or using our imagination to dispel the dust in our eyes til we can truly see our togetherness and interconnection with all of life. Its paradoxically a journey as long as a million lifetimes, and as short as your very next breath.

The paradox is that we're all seeking unconditional love through conditional experiences. The real question is 'what does it take to get beyond conditions?' We've got so many practices, but they're all just pointers, not the destination. What needs to break down so that love can break through? May we all have just enough cracks and just enough support for breakthroughs instead of breakdowns.

Though royalty preceded her, only the old woman gave like a true queen. The irony is that it often takes the utter humility of poverty to internalize the truth that whatever we have is a gift of the universe. Those of us with more wealth are often drunk on the wine of our egos which bubble tales of our own talent, smarts, and grit. When you're hungry and cold, you soberly taste the divine with gratitude in every bite. May we give like kings and queens, so we never become beggars with riches.

The metaphor of the body as the space suit we don for this human experience is soothing one, especially if you follow the data around how we are undermining the capacity the planet to support human society as we've known it. Learning to see our fellow humans like trees-- basically all the same with more in common than not-- is the first small step for man even as its a giant leap for humanity. The next small step is to see all of life as having more in common with us than the rest of the vast universe, which appears mostly inert and lifeless from our present definition of life. Until we can see nature as ourselves and ourselves in nature, the natural world is condemned to be both a source of raw material for our egoic machinations and the dumping ground for the waste of our collective shadow. Anyone without the vigor to seriously get right with Nature and bow their head in reverance had best be prepared to make themselves at ease with losing the privilege to don a human space suit for themselves and their descendants. May we learn the lesson of living a human existence with humility and reverence for that which animates our life!

Loved this articulation of voting with attention in our era where attention is being ever more deeply mined and manipulated by the most powerful corporations in the world. Training attention to stay where we'd like it is 'concentration'. Aiming concentration at the deeper layer of reality is 'meditation'. Becoming accomplished in meditation is the ultimate rebellion, the final revolution that is beyond any change we seek in the ordinary dysfunction of the world. Until the final revolution has awakened in my own being, besides voting with my attention, I'll vote with my ballot as if my life depended on it even as I attempt to hold any electoral outcome equally lightly.

Not so long ago, I was struggling with a person who lived near me. Her behavior seemed hostile, selfish, destructive, and obstinate all at once. In the face of directly observable facts-- like those that were recorded on video-- she rejected any notion of an agreed upon reality or set of baseline facts. I was simply flummoxed and at the end of my wits to understand how to deal with this person. Then it just so happened that I became aware of her extreme financial vulnerability. The room spun. Suddenly I understood why she couldn't meet me in 'reality'. My view of her transformed from 'destructive and obstinate' to 'scared and desperate'. I could see both of these views, and knew they were both stories -- two among many that existed simultaneously. This multiplicity of views does not mean that all views are equal, but exposes a nearly universal flaw in our thinking where we simultaneously assume there is only one right view (ours) and also identify with and cling to that view as if the core of our being and the meaning of our life depends upon it. Meaning is a story to respond the question of 'why?'. Why me? Why here? Why now? Why this? At first, we're given the stories of our culture, religion, family, and society to answer those questions. Some of those stories cause us pain or make us uncomfortable, especially if we're not the type to be placated with easy answers. Then a few of us learn the art of spinning our own stories. These stories open a new level of power, as we begin to take agency and responsibility in the face of suffering. From this space of choice and activity, yet a smaller number us still sit uncomfortably with the meaning we ourselves spin. If we're courageous enough, we can sit with what is without seeking or clinging to any meaning. Finally one day we may arrive at something beyond meaning on the other side of all our whys. Before that time, each person sits with a unique river of circumstances, qu... [View Full Comment] Not so long ago, I was struggling with a person who lived near me. Her behavior seemed hostile, selfish, destructive, and obstinate all at once. In the face of directly observable facts-- like those that were recorded on video-- she rejected any notion of an agreed upon reality or set of baseline facts. I was simply flummoxed and at the end of my wits to understand how to deal with this person. Then it just so happened that I became aware of her extreme financial vulnerability. The room spun. Suddenly I understood why she couldn't meet me in 'reality'. My view of her transformed from 'destructive and obstinate' to 'scared and desperate'. I could see both of these views, and knew they were both stories -- two among many that existed simultaneously. This multiplicity of views does not mean that all views are equal, but exposes a nearly universal flaw in our thinking where we simultaneously assume there is only one right view (ours) and also identify with and cling to that view as if the core of our being and the meaning of our life depends upon it.

Meaning is a story to respond the question of 'why?'. Why me? Why here? Why now? Why this? At first, we're given the stories of our culture, religion, family, and society to answer those questions. Some of those stories cause us pain or make us uncomfortable, especially if we're not the type to be placated with easy answers. Then a few of us learn the art of spinning our own stories. These stories open a new level of power, as we begin to take agency and responsibility in the face of suffering. From this space of choice and activity, yet a smaller number us still sit uncomfortably with the meaning we ourselves spin. If we're courageous enough, we can sit with what is without seeking or clinging to any meaning. Finally one day we may arrive at something beyond meaning on the other side of all our whys. Before that time, each person sits with a unique river of circumstances, questions, and stories which they navigate on an inevitable journey towards the ocean we must all cross.[Hide Full Comment]

The alchemy of transformation may lie in the alternating repetition of observing the outside and the inside on the clarified mirror of our consciousness. We see things in the world we find upsetting, disconcerting, not in alignment with our deepest values-- which themselves are often aspirational rather than truly embodied. In witnessing this, we recoil against it, saying "that's not me". If we have the discipline to take a deep hard look on the inside, we find all the garbage, horror, and ugliness that we revile in the world also hiding in the shadows of our mind and heart. Then we must have the courage to say to all that we abhor "yes, that's me". Like an outgoing breath exhaling "not me, not me" coupled with the inhaling breath of "i am that, that is me", the space of stillness at the crossroads of exhalation and inspiration is where the mind settles into a place beyond knowing-- where we have no choice but to bow if our eyes have opened even a little bit. A place from where we return with the humility of simple recognition that we may be a continuing gesture of an aspiration to know and love all the magnificently horrible beauty nested in a totality that is beyond words.

I find that "How are you?" is a very poor question to ask someone who is close to you because its such a common question. Its rare for it to be a sincere question that merits a full and proper answer.

Instead, here are five better questions.
1. What moved you today?
2. What were the biggest challenges of the day?
3. What did you learn today?
4. Is there anything you would want to undo or do over from today?
5. What were the strongest emotions you felt today?

In the most perceptive and grounded viewpoint, its not that Life drops many bags of gold in our path. Its actually that there is nothing but gold on our path. What keeps us from seeing it? We're distracted, imbalanced, and unclear. The irony is that its actually the most difficult situations that are most golden, yet these are the ones that challenge our equanimity and clarity the most such that its all too easy to identify with our strongly reactive self, and totally miss the gold. Its a daily practice, as the ordinary mind is more prone to the wish of "please no more 'gold'" i.e. difficult situations!

The insight in this passage hit home for me powerfully a few weeks ago perhaps a week after New Years. I was driving and listening to the radio. The guest-expert was talking about the basic process of how to keep New Years resolutions, and activating a process of self-understanding during the invariable lapses that occur when we slp back into the behavior we're seeking to dismantle. A caller dialed in with a question about a particular kind of behavior, and the guest-expert responded with advice that was designed to "trick your brain". Right then the insight occurred like lightening. How can you trick your brain if your consciousness is arising in your brain? What and who is getting tricked, and who is perpetrating the trick when "tricking the brain". I clearly experienced that there is no so-called "self" that I can point to. As I examined my mind, there isn't even a single consciousness running the show, but rather a set distinct and sometimes competing consciousnesses. Even the observer of these consciousnesses is not 'myself', as that observing turns off like a light switch in deep sleep, and is often not even fully in the realm of awareness during wakeful times. Suddenly so many conflicts that I were having different people in my life fell away like a ton of bricks. Every fight is an act of defending this so-called self, which is so temporary that even its present form is constantly walking like a green mountain. Just as all that tension, angst, and anger fell away, I was also clear that it doesn't mean that I don't have to or won't fight with people where I was in active conflict. Rather, I understand and experience this conflict without taking on any mental residue from it. Its not personal, and carries no ill will or anger. What a relief to be able to set aside the negativity that was coming from inevitable conflict!

I have discovered many unkind and even cruel thoughts arising in me in relation to a person in my life who actively seeks to provoke me many times a week.  When I step out of the self-righteousness behind these unkind thoughts, I find myself having some sympathy for the worst people out there (think dictators & tyrants), who take things a step further and act upon their negative emotions.  Moreover, I notice how much of these unwholesome thoughts are followed by a depletion of my energy and a derailing of my focus-- both of which beome the primary motivation to not indulge in these sorts of negative states.  As much as we seek to punish those whom we perceive are doing wrong and misbehaving, a close examination of ourselves reveals that what is true for us must be doubly true for them: the negative state they are in is both its own punishment and the seed of future suffering for themselves and others.  The greatest gift we can give is to cultivate the inner capacity to not be a conduit for spewing negative emotions.

 A brilliant and powerful question to pose, not just to leaders.  I experienced this through two conflicts that arose: one with a conventionally powerful person, and the other with a tenant in one of my rental properties who occurs for me as a problematic and nasty personality.  The powerful person occurs to me as everything Margaret Wheatley describes above, which is very much in contrast with the publicly projected persona.  And yet in dealing with my nasty tenant, I found all sorts of horrible and mean thoughts about her occurring in my mind.  Suddenly I realized the tremendous gift that I was receiving from having this difficult tenant:  she was showing me my flaws and lack of integrity.  I too project a public persona of being kind, generous, and easy-going but the thoughts in my head were downright mean, selfish, and manipulative / controlling.  Oh how much I need to grow!  How much I am just like that powerful person who is generating conflict with me!  That was enough for me commit to being getting my head and heart in integrity with my persona and treating the tenant differently not despite her nastiness, but because of it.  Truly priceless... and yet powerful people rarely receive genuine feedback from those around them.  This brain death for empathy is the blindpot from which great wounds and re-wounds are inflicted upon everyone around them.  Wonderful that Margaret Wheatley can whisper this question in their ears!

The most dangerous man is the one with no self doubt.  WIth a little bit of material prosperity in one hand, and enough of a feel of dharma in the other, such a man declares that which he doesn't understand to be either irrelevant, non-existent, or colored wholly with the shade of his own wrong view.  The result is to re-injure the world in the ways one is broken because of the inability to confront the blind spot that self-doubt points toward.  How to wake up such a man before his actions drive past the point of oblivion?  This kind of man is a metaphor for a slightly awakened western civilization as well, possessing prosperity and a little bit of understanding of the subtle, while unconsciously destroying everying it does not understand.

 Enoughness of small graces is a paradox, akin to the concept of human perfection.  Shunryu Suzuki summed it up perfectly when he said, "Each of you is perfect the way you are ... and you can use a little improvement."  When we consider human evolution, paying attention to all the little things that are not quite right is what allowed our ancestors to survive on the savannah, whereas basking in the gratitude and sufficiency of small graces might lead to inattention toward fundamental survival threats.  In the modern world, we must balance the ever-rising tide of hedonic adapation-- where we get so used to every new comfort and advantage that it ceases to bring us joy-- with gratitude for both the blessings and challenges we encounter.  In my personal experience, this is very difficult to do without both a meditation and a gratitude practice.  Meditation is what trains and restrains the momentum of the powerful subconscious mind that operates wildly like our ancestors from the savannah.  Gratitude is the precious food that puts a higher clarity and perspective in charge.

Another way of re-stating this is that life is offering sufficiency at every turn for the task at hand.  Our distractions keeps us unaware of the underlying ebb and flow, and never quite clear enough to know our purpose in the moment because of the momentum of the past or the grasping for the future.  We experience that dissipation and energetic gap as depression.  For all those who face some form of clinical depression, the question I hold is whether depression preceded thought, did thought precede depression, or do they arise together and support one another?  Do we believe what we experience, or do we experience what we believe?  I suspect that getting to the bottom of these questions will create the space and energy to rise from the downward spiral we experience in depression.

This reminds me of the classic 'circle of influence' and 'circle of concern' which is always a superset of the first.  Our greatest power is always in our circle of influence, but we often discount the tremendous ripple power of authentically inhabiting that limiting circle.  As the Servicespace ecosystem often says, "Change yourself, change the world."

I've heard humility defined as, "Suspending judgment to allow what is, to arise."  How natural it is for the farmer to be humble, how difficult for us, with our multiplicity of wants, needs, desires, and views.  Remembering personal history, and how often things which seemed like victories came with barbs and traps, while that which often felt like defeat was actually a gateway to brighter vistas is of great help to me in staying balanced with the present moment.

Loved the extension of this story back to its original roots.  Made me think of whether we can apply the same analogy to the external world i.e.  we have unsavory characters who embody the black wolf more than the white in many parts of our workplaces and official institutions.  Is this a wise choice, mindful of the wisdom of this passage?  Is the black wolf within, and the black wolves without, content not reign supreme and dominate the white wolf?  Personally, I am unsure, but I once heard of people complaining to a well-known saint about mischief done by unsavory characters in her organization.  Her response was that she had to keep them close, or they'd create much more mischief in the outside world.

A true friend is one who acts for your benefit.  So before you can answer whether the universe is friendly, you must deeply consider both the nature of what benefits you most and the question of who or what "you" are. If your concept of self is individualistic, then achievements, ambitions, dreams, fame, power, possessions, pleasures, successes, etc are the things that seem to benefit you the most.  From this lens, the universe is a decidedly unfriendly place, as all of these things come into your grasp only fleetingly, with circumstance, people, or time ultimately snatching or shattering them all.  Most of us begin our journey's as true believers in an individualistic self, only to be repeatedly crushed or slowly sapped by the universe until we're thoroughly convinced that we've swallowed a flawed or incomplete picture. If you begin with the truth that all you have will be taken from you, then you are forced to re-evaluate your notion of self and self-benefit.  The interconnection and interdependence you witness from acceptance of the inescapable impermanence around you and inside you are a pleasant ways of saying that you will both eat and be eaten in every domain of your existence.  Your first food was your mother's body through nursing, and this eating and being eaten were filled with affection, joy, even pleasure for both.  If you can get past the guilt of eating and the fear of being eaten, you begin to touch the joy of witnessing the flow of life.  And the more you witness that joy, the more it seems to be the only thing that makes sense about who you are and why you're here. The universe manifests you, maintains you for a while, and then mercilessly chews and crushes you until you have no choice but to burst with joy and wonder at every second and every square inch of the humming, buzzing symphony of existence.  And that chewing is probably the most friendly thing that's ever happen... [View Full Comment] A true friend is one who acts for your benefit.  So before you can answer whether the universe is friendly, you must deeply consider both the nature of what benefits you most and the question of who or what "you" are.

If your concept of self is individualistic, then achievements, ambitions, dreams, fame, power, possessions, pleasures, successes, etc are the things that seem to benefit you the most.  From this lens, the universe is a decidedly unfriendly place, as all of these things come into your grasp only fleetingly, with circumstance, people, or time ultimately snatching or shattering them all.  Most of us begin our journey's as true believers in an individualistic self, only to be repeatedly crushed or slowly sapped by the universe until we're thoroughly convinced that we've swallowed a flawed or incomplete picture.

If you begin with the truth that all you have will be taken from you, then you are forced to re-evaluate your notion of self and self-benefit.  The interconnection and interdependence you witness from acceptance of the inescapable impermanence around you and inside you are a pleasant ways of saying that you will both eat and be eaten in every domain of your existence.  Your first food was your mother's body through nursing, and this eating and being eaten were filled with affection, joy, even pleasure for both.  If you can get past the guilt of eating and the fear of being eaten, you begin to touch the joy of witnessing the flow of life.  And the more you witness that joy, the more it seems to be the only thing that makes sense about who you are and why you're here.

The universe manifests you, maintains you for a while, and then mercilessly chews and crushes you until you have no choice but to burst with joy and wonder at every second and every square inch of the humming, buzzing symphony of existence.  And that chewing is probably the most friendly thing that's ever happened to you, even if feels like pain in every bite.[Hide Full Comment]

The passage reminds me a of a conversation I was having with a friend where I complained about the insidiousness of the media world, continually snagging, distracting, trapping, and dissipating people.  He responded by acknowledging that truth, but pointing out that to get snagged, you have to have hooks.  The lesson for me was that its more important to work on smoothing out those latent tendencies and desires that lead us to our own entrapment than complaining about the systems that are designed to trap people.

Anyone who has bought organic vegetables knows that they spoil much faster than industrial vegetables.  Anyone who has visited a tropical forest knows that there are tons of bugs that want to eat a little piece of your body. It seems that wherever there is some life energy, there is something that is trying to take a little bit of that energy for itself.  In a modern western environment where we have largely eliminated the natural pests that perform this function, we seem to have incorporated the pestilence into our collective nature, where to varying degrees, people live off the energy, attention, and inattention of their fellow man.  To some degree, this is a statement of our interconnectedness, but just beyond that is the realm of our individual intentions in the world.  We must take to live, but we must also give to live.  What is the most skillful way to dance in that reality?

The only answer seems to come from concentrating and deepening our attention so we're conscious of our hooks, and put some space between us and our lures.  The space gives us choice, and choice offers us increasing freedom in outsmarting our evolutionary hooks.