"One of the wisest souls you know" should write his memoir. Encourage that, please, because there are so many prisoners who could benefit from it, along with the members of his family. I, too, have a friend serving a life sentence. While wise and good, I'm not sure how spiritual she is. Please contact me if your friend has something she can read. Thank you, Anthony
Everyone going through the stages of Alzheimer Disease would do well to read this article. It's a situation for which there is no cure. One simply has to stand by watching the disintegration of a loved one. It's a beyond sad process that can only be endured. One step at a time, one glimmer of joyful moments, which can come at any time, is the only way walk this journey. There can be no "Why me?" attitude, because there is no answer to that question. "Why anybody?" is more like it. So, you are correct. All these sour experiences in life are what life is all about, as much as the good times we face in life. Better to always look for the silver lining, because it is there to be seen, and you can see them even through tears.
I have amazing memories of my childhood. I can recount them and even see them in my mind today. I assumed for a long time that most people can remember such meaningful events, but I have learned that isn't always so. Many of my memories are unpleasant, but not all of them. I think the stressful times have made me less strong interiorly. I can put up a good facade when necessary, but I know the damage to my inner core has lasted my whole life. I have countered it successfully, for the most part, but the truth is that those painful moments have left me vulnerable. Because I have such vivid memories, I've often thought I should write a book about them, simply to alert parents that their actions regarding their children shapes those youngsters more than they know. For example, any violence toward one another or their child could leave a lasting scar. A dysfunctional family is detrimental to the development of children who witness physical or emotional battles. Verbal assaults, as well as physical, have long-lasting effects. You might think he or she is too young to remember, but that is surely debatable. Too much pressure, too much anger and too much dictating or forcing will undermine the wholeness of your youngsters.
I never felt clever, and I'm not sure I've ever felt so bewildered as I am today due to the loss of my husband's well-being. A battle with Alzheimer Disease has diminished him greatly, and he was one always wise. He always knew the right way to think and act. He was a rock, and it's hard to live without him in totality. The lesson I derive is to try to emulate the way I saw him maneuver through life's difficulties. If bewilderment means feeling lost, weakened, and bereft, then I am bewildered, but I am trying my best to do the right things. When we have lost our North Star, difficulties are not easy to navigate.
Maybe it's time for some truth. Your friend might not realize how repetitive she has become, and how such negativity helps no one. There are cruel losses in life, but life must go forward with an abiding sense of hope that better times will come. To become so mired in your own grief that you can think of nothing else benefits no one. Honoring a loved one's memory with kindness toward others is restorative. What was it that the lost one would have desired in his life? Figure that out, then help someone else's aspirations come true in honor of the beloved son who was denied the chance to achieve his goals. Just some thoughts that might help your friend go on with the life in a positive manner, rather than drown herself in a sea of grief.
No matter how little your "kind deed" may be, it will have an impact on the receiver in some way, maybe never forgotten. Jo G. and I worked together. She was much older than I at the time she presented me with a small mother of pearl circle pin out of the blue. It wasn't a holiday or a birthday, it was just a sweet gesture. I no longer have the pin, except in my memory, but I have cherished them both, Jo and her gift, all the days of my 84 years!! Just keep "giving" in some small way or large way, and we will all benefit in ways we never know.
A quirky little incident...As I was taking a morning walk, I was jolted by something which suddenly fell on the top of my head. It was a small little pebble. Too small to hurt, it just made me laugh. I had been thinking about a deceased friend of mine known for his journalistic skills and sense of humor. "Must be Charley," I thought, "letting me know he still has his sense of humor." I saved it for the longest time as a reminder that sweet things can happen when we least expect it.
My imagination is rusty, but I go on with life in the last chapter still hoping that God will finally open eyes of the powerful that my friend, Nancy Seaman, never a threat to society, will be released from prison after 20 years of an unjust life-sentence. I imagine that I still have time "to get things in order." I imagine happy endings and fascinating new beginnings we can only imagine.
Reading this again, I'm wondering how Brian's son is doing today. I know what it is like to be haunted by actions of the past, and I guess most of us experience "haunting." This is such a powerful piece of literature. I hope Brian has gone forward with his writing, and I hope his son is doing even better than expected.
I can't say I have ever had such a life-changing experience or awakening, but I loved reading about his. What a beautiful change of consciousness and a new way of thinking and living. Seek and ye shall find your real self!! Thanks for sharing your profound story, Drew Lanham!
Philosopher Eknath Easwaren teaches that meditation can help us train our attention. When we are aware of our monkey mind at work, we are simply to go back to the beginning of the passage we are trying to ingest. Each time we wander, we must go back to the beginning. Eventually, we will absorb what it is we wish to understand or retain.
Examining oneself with an open heart and mind is an act of courage which leads to personal growth. Who among us is perfect, or even wishes to be perfect? Better we should try to be a better "us. " A wise friend once made a statement I have never forgotten..."Comparisons are odious." I think there is a connection regarding becoming the best person we can be...comparing ourselves to no other than our self!!
On Oct 8, 2024 Pat Hardy wrote on Liberation, by Salvador Poe: