All Comments By

 Everyone suffers, there is no getting around this fact. However what we do with our suffering is a different matter. There are different kinds of suffering, and there are different ways we can deal with our suffering. There is real suffering, like physical pain, or loss of a loved one. And then there is imaginary suffering, based on negative imagination; worry about what others may think of us, feelings of disappointment or resentment, when events don't turn out the way we expected them to turn out, feelings of being misunderstood, feelings of self pity etc.. The difference between real and imaginary suffering is often difficult to see. Real suffering is unavoidable, imaginary suffering is a result of our own negative trains of thought, and is entirely avoidable.

When we suffer, a chain of automatic internal response begins. The negativity of suffering multiplies by something like a factor of 100. Some one insults us, first we are hurt, then offended, then resentful, then angry, we turn the subject over and over, think up ways we should have responded, plot revenge and so forth, all according to our programming, and we only forget the insult very slowly. From one point of view, it is exciting to feel negative, it even gives us the illusion that we are "real", for anyone who is suffering to the extent we feel we are suffering,"must be real".

When something good happens to us, a chain of automatic response also begins. However, as odd as it might seem,the positive emotion only multiplies by a factor of something like 10. Someone compliments us, we feel a spark of happiness,a momentary thrill, we may think about it a couple of times, feel a few good feelings related to our memory of the event, then we forget about it fairly rapidly. 

It takes psychic energy to sustain moments of higher consciousness. Negative emotions burn up psychic  energy, which is why we feel exhausted afterwards. When we have a positive emotion it actually creates psychic energy, which is why we feel invigorated after a good laugh.

If awakening is your aim, that is, if one is actively committed to the process of spiritual development, one comes to the problem of  where to get enough psychic energy, to elevate one's higher self, high enough to enter, and sustain a higher state of consciousness. This is where suffering can be of great value, because the negative emotions produced by suffering can be transformed into positive emotions. When this happens the 100 factor multiplies by the 10 factor,  positive emotions produced as a result of transforming negative emotions multiply by a factor of 1000. Christ's simple statement, "Forgive them, they know not what they do". Has multiplied itself far beyond the 1000 times factor, it has powerfully touched people the world over,changing the way generations of men conduct themselves toward one another, a most beautiful example of this principle in action.

How can we transform suffering? Very simply, by accepting it, by rising above it without expressing it. To do this one must find a place above suffering and from that higher space, simply watch all of the automatic negative feelings that arise as a result, without attaching a sense of  identity to them. We are not those negative emotions, they are just passing phenomenon, temporary, transitory in nature. Transforming suffering is not to be confused with suppressing suffering, pretending to ourselves that we are not suffering, is simply living a lie. Transformation occurs when we find a space "to be" above suffering, and observe it, without identifying with it, without blame without judgment.

When we successfully are able to transform suffering, something grows in us, something strengthens,  virtue expands, we find ourselves blessed with increased tolerance, patience, increased ability to compassionately forgive. There is nothing which makes us more God-like than transforming suffering, for think...God, the source of all Being, must have transformed the travail associated with the act of turning the potential of pre-creation, into this, our manifest reality. I remember this when suffering seems more than "I can bare", and it is exactly at this point, where all that is weak in one says, "I can't take any more" that one CAN take more, and it is at this leading edge of transformation, that surmounted, leads to the greatest spiritual development. Rilke, a sensitive German poet of the 1800's said, "We are wasters of sorrows". Everyone suffers, there is no avoiding it, if we burn the energy we could gain by transforming it, by indulging in negative emotions, wallowing in self pity, resentment, anger, self doubt, and so forth, we waste our opportunities to add much, to our inner spiritual life.

Deep down inside, we all know that transforming suffering leads to states of grace, studying how to gain the strength to rise above, and how not to succumb to the lower states suffering evokes, is a worthy pursuit. One we master, slowly, over time, by degrees.

 Everyone suffers, there is no escape from it. How we respond to suffering, is a different matter. Some people prolong suffering unnecessarily, wallowing in self pity, resentment, anger, self righteous indignation, blaming others and etc.; others accept suffering, separate themselves from it and rise above it, thereby they attain "grace".

There are different kinds of suffering, real and imaginary. If you break your arm for instance, you experience real suffering, if you choose to be offended by the action of another, considering the action to be an insult and/or that the other "does not understand me", this is imaginary suffering, for if you had chosen to take the action in another way, or if you had tried to understand, what circumstances led the other person to perform the action, instead of feeling miss-understood yourself, then you would not have suffered.

From one point of view, it is all a question of energy, a specific kind of energy, psychic  energy. Wallowing in self pity, or imagined wrong, uses up this energy, which is the very energy we need to sustain higher states of consciousness. When we accept suffering, endure it without expressing it, we transform the negative energy suffering evokes into positive energy, this process allows us to not only gain energy that would otherwise be lost, but to produce more energy, this energy fuels the state of "grace", because it can be used to sustain higher states. Upon experiencing suffering, we can choose to elevate our state above it,  penetrate the present, and add to this "grace" to our true selves, or we can choose to descend into self pity, anger, resentment, bitterness, blame others, etc., and loose our Selves in these lower states, how we respond to suffering is entirely up to us.

It is difficult to separate one's true self from the suffering of the personality and body, yet the reward for doing so is an increased ability to sustain higher states within, and an increase of the energy required for doing so.

Suffering is not pleasant, yet taken rightly, it can furnish us with the very thing we need to awaken, and from this point of view is something to be thank-full for. Rilke, a sensitive German poet of the past, said "We are wasters of sorrow." To wallow in negative emotions produced in response to suffering truly wastes our finest energies, where as transforming suffering, boosts our finer energies, making them available for sustaining states of "grace", increasing our understanding,  leading us into wisdom.

Recently a person commented to me, "Life is what happens to people, while they are making other plans."  This is true for many people today, which begs the questions: How has this happened? Can this be changed?

With the advent of mass media, our societies have been saturated with social programming that introduced new attitudes among peoples. This phenomenon has caused a change in humans, as a result, we behave differently, than generations of the past did. Through mass media programing, humanity adopted a different set of attitudinal criteria for assessing and assigning  "value" . The value of "things", the value of "actions", the value of "others", the value of acquiring "money", the value of "affluence", the value of being "in", the value of "virtue", the value of "spiritual development", the value of the" inner Self", all these have been assigned a changed degree of importance or non importance by media broadcasts in our various cultures.

This has come to us in the form of advertisements, movies, it is a kind of collective propaganda, haphazardly created by people who can afford to use the media for their promoting their products,agendas, ideas, services, opinions etc.. In the past an individual or small group of people, could only effect the values of so broad a slice of humanity  very slowly, if at all. Miss information was not so easily spread, fashions were not so easily influenced, trends not easily manipulated, virtues not so easily ignored. Every one alive on the planet has been effected to a lesser or greater degree by mass media programming, we share this in common. 

In the past ideas governing attitudes changed slowly, trends tended to remain steady. People had more time to evaluate ideas from their own experience, to question whether an idea, a thing, an action proved itself useful, valid, according to their own set of experiential criteria for judging values, comparing values. Now many of our experiences are created for us by mass media. These experiences are artificial, we've filled up much of our inner space with these artificial experiences, our ideas about the world, our attitudes toward life, our standards for good and bad, the interpretations we make about our personal experiences are influenced by them.

Do modern humans, as a whole, have a life of their own? We are so filled with artificial attitudes, which operate quite automatically, un-examined "as if" they were our own, that we can no longer be sure if we are living our own life, making our own choices. We are programmed to "make money", to "settle down", "reproduce", "get an education", "drink coca-cola", belong to this group or that, we are told, what to hate, what to fear, what success is and the standards whereby to measure it, we are programmed, how to dress, and how to think, what is "cool", what attitudes to use to deal with every kind of situation which we may find ourselves facing. In the midst of all this, where are our authentic Selves? What would it mean for our own authentic Self to begin to live, not according to our programming, but according to the essential nature of our own true being? Would we engage in activities contrary to our own authenticity? I think not. We would be true to ourselves in the purest sense. We would not live lives we hated, perform jobs we found no joy in,  say and do things we'd later regret...even now, deep down inside, we know we would be different, truer to our inner Nature, if we could figure out how to do it effortlessly, and the world, we know, would be a changed place for it.

So how can we "get a life? Our own authentic life? The answer lies in penetrating the moment. Our life is composed of events, events are composed of moments, moments are composed of NOW. This moment, right now is where we, authentic living Being, exist. If we do not find our selves here, where else can we find our selves? If we let this moment go by, like so many others, without truly penetrating "now" with our conscious Being, making it our own crystal of time, if we fill our minds with all the things we're programmed to think, to value, to feel, to fear, and act from that programming; can we be said to "live an authentic life"?

Socrates said "the unexamined life is not worth living". To discover our own authentic nature we must begin to examine our programming, where it came from, we need to question our motives, question our habitual attitudes, prove ideas out under the open sky, in the light of our daily moments. When we shine the light of examination on our programming and with open eyes, pick out the artificial attitudes and values, and replace them with attitudes and values that "sit right with our own hearts", then our lives will truly be worth living. We will live our own authenticity. Authenticity is infectious, when the authentic living Being in us, vibrates with the truth of it's own authenticity, it sets up a similar vibration in others. When we embrace an authentic life, we send out ripples of authenticity through all of humanity, one moment at a time. The present is the leading edge of eternity, live here and embrace your own life, true to tour essential Nature.

 It takes a certain kind of courage to live authentically, it is not popular, nor will such a life heap up money. Such a life however, is richly filled with experience, from which grows wisdom and understanding, and these can not be bought, at any price.

 Syd,

I have given you question deep thought, drawing on my own experience.

Holding on to a higher state does not come automatically, it is a process which requires practice. First we must find our selves, what begins the search for the Self is mind, the Self is so used to letting the mind direct attention, that it forgets that it is the rightful owner of attention, and not the mind. When the mind touches the true Self with attention, attention "sticks" to the self, its rightful owner, and the Self "wakes up" momentarily, in a higher state of consciousness. This feeling of "lost"  when entering such a state, comes from the mind, which being deprived of the ability to control attention,  goes into mental confusion.

We have been so thoroughly programmed by our social/cultural upbringing to find our identity through the data collected over time by the mind/body, that this separation of attention's control from the mind, back to the true self, however brief, is an uncomfortable experience, being so unfamiliar to us, and also thrilling in conscious clarity, at the same time. A true paradox.

The state is so unusual, and certainly scary from the instinctive point of view, for the body and its functions produce the sense that they, and not the living being, are the producers of our life, when the attention is no longer under the control of the mind/body, and Self surfaces, then one is faced with the fact that the body is not immortal, that the death of the body is a reality, which it only fooled us into believing is not.

One must learn to endure this uncomfortable feeling, which lessens over time. The "big trap', is believing the mind/body's fears of death and impermanence are fears the Self "should" identify with and claim as its own. As soon as the living being, who is us, succumbs to this fear, attention attaches to it, the mind grabs back control, and we loose hold of the higher state. Practice is the key, which takes a keen desire to awaken and the exercise of will. Do not loose hope, look up, you are not alone, you have help, persevere and you will pierce the veil of eternity.

There is only one source of Being, and in so far as we partake of Being, we are that Being. Being IS, and will always BE. Fear of death is an illusion, as silly as a that of a drop of water, tossed high in the air by a wave, fearing falling into the great ocean, and becoming ocean.

 It is indeed true that we are born into helpless, undeveloped bodies. This undeveloped body, is animated by living Being. The body in which living being takes form, is equipped with an essence, having tastes, preferences and tendencies, as well as a full set of undeveloped functions, the normal ones, instinctive, moving, intellectual and emotional, as well as some others, which are not commonly stimulated to develop by ordinary life. Our essence is designed to collect data to itself, the kind of programming it receives, tempered by its native tendencies determines the type of personality it develops.
If the programming we have received is contrary to the native tendencies in our essence, then the personality is in conflict with essence. This leads to suffering for the living being animating the body. Our culture programs us to think that the external material world, of material things, money, status...according to material possessions, compliance with the latest fashions, ability to exercise power over others, etc. has more value, than the development of the essence belonging to the body housing the internal living being. In this case, the personality plays the roll of a guard, holding the inner living being a prisoner in its programs, dictating to the being what it "should" do, think, act, feel, eat, etcetera. It slowly begins to control all the impressions the being could use for its growth, replacing the real impressions with "concepts", which at best are good translations of the real would of direct impression.
Yet, there is a part residing in the body, that, if stimulated, begins to question the validity of the acquired personality.
Under favorable circumstances this part can help us separate the life of the inner world, from that of the outer world, and that same part can help the living being realize its spiritual nature, and assist the being, which is our very life, to gain control over the "guard" and insist that the "guard" become the "guardian" of the living being, which is its correct roll in relationship to us.
If this happens, we truly begin to "REALize our "Self"  (that's self with a big "S"), We then, begin to "become", to exist in higher states of waking consciousness. First, in short flashes, then for longer periods. If we focus our attention, and apply our will, to developing a new personality, one that is passive in relationship to the Living Being residing within our body, it becomes the servant of the "Self" and not the master, the good steward how does his masters bidding". This happens when we , the living Being, makes the effort to "BE" in the present. moment. To truly "see" with the eyes, color, texture, form, to hear with ears, not just having them hang around.

The beginning of a new relationship with the "SELF" begins with this process, where personality, conforms to the essence of the living being, and not the other way around. It is in this new order, that the Living Being begins to thrive, grow, and develop, the end product of that development of that development is an increased ability of the living being to sustain its consciousness on a higher level of being.

Life erroneously, programs us, to place value in external things, yet the death of the body, and release of the living Being from the form of our "Name sake", shows that the living being can take no "material thing" with it, only its real experiences, the wisdom it has gain in a life well lived, and an increased ability to maintain the "Self" on a higher level of being. 

When this more spiritually inclined part of our personality begins to activate, it produces new thoughts, "who am I? Why am I here? Are my opinions and attitudes valid, or even my own?" It asks.  When finding the answer to these type of begins to burn in our psyche, we search for them. If we imagine that the answers lie outside, we get lost in acquiring what we have been taught to believe will give us happiness, fulfillment.  Yet the answers we seek, whose finding will bring true fulfillment, are within our own "Self". If we go inward, and find our true "Self", and awaken it, even for a moment, and we do this over and over. Gradually a new, relationship develops between our outer material personality "self" (with a small "s") and the living being who is truly our own authentic "Self". 

When the outer becomes as the inner, we find what we have been looking for, we find our own Being, rich, Being filled with conscious life of a higher nature.

The word "love", in English, has many meanings. When I was a child, I "loved" my mother, chocolate ice cream, to play with my friends, the color red... etc.. As a young person I "loved" science fiction, an actor in a TV show, the cute boy in class, my dog, horses, someone's hair... the list went on, of course. As a young adult, I "loved" my current boyfriend, going to parties with my friends, helping other young people out...and so on and so forth. As a mature adult, my "ideas" about what the word "love" means has developed, matured. I have suffered the meaning of the word, and have transformed much of that suffering into a deeper understanding of the higher aspects of "love". I have also learned, that the word is so loosely used, in general speaking, that it is actually inadequate, to communicate the particular emotional state I wish to express.  In "talking" about  "love" (which can actually, only be felt), then, I must, for the sake of honest communication, give an exact description, to the sense, in which, I am using the word.

The Greeks have four words for love, "storge", which is a kind of natural affection between ourselves and our close associates, familial love, we can even feel this type of love for our pets. Then there is " philia", which is brotherly love, a deep and abiding friendship, where one wants the best for the other and tries to do that for them. "Eros" is romantic, passion for another, with sexual overtones, it is a very strong desire to merge, with the other, it can easily become connected, over time, with a desire to own or possess the other, if  this happens it usually turns into something negative. The last Greek word for "love" is "agape". Agape is a kind of unconditional love, one that cannot change, it is an enduring love, the love we have for all humanity, our love for the Universal creator, the love we have for our own higher self,  that is, our own little bit of BEING, and ultimately it is a kind of unconditional "love" for all bits of BEING everywhere, as all BEING arises from the same source, and so far as we our selves partake of BEING, we are that BEING, and so is all BEING ad-infinitum. Agape is the love of "God", yet to experience this love, one must find, and awaken "the God BEING", dwelling in one's own heart.

For me, this last form of love, "agape", is the form of love I have learned to call "home". I don't find my way to this home in my heart, that often. It is not easy to remain there when I do, the mind produces, so much that distracts me away from that place, automatic programming, opinions, judgment about everything and anything. To be there, I must be "here", in the present, it takes work, it requires conscious effort, to operate from this moment, to bring my BEING into this state of "love". It requires a certain kind of special energy to maintain my attention here.And  I cannot sustain my attention, here, for too long, I experience this state in flashes, yet even the briefest moment, brings the wisdom and understanding of my connectedness. I am connected to you, and you are connected to me, we are connected to all BEING. Like you, I am one of the myriad creatures, one speck of all the forms of BEING has taken, experiencing, advancing, with you, creating this reality, which is home.