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Heng Ch'au
Wednesday
March 8, 1978
North of Cambria, California
Camped in a cow pasture overlooking the ocean last night. Quiet, we bowed across san Simeon creek this AM. Thee road north is still closed due to winter storms. A man in a van stopped,
"You boys are really gonna' get wet today, yes sir. She's gonna' rain big today, yes sir, hee hee hee," laughs, "Gonna rain real big they say, hee hee hee."
We both look out to sea at the huge black puffs if thunderclouds gathering in the west.
'Well I just thought I'd stop and tell you. You gonna' get rained on. Yes sir, hee hee hee."
The rain is like karma, impartial. If we have it coming to us, it will find us. If we don't have it coming to us, then even in the midst of a storm we'll be safe. If one can straighten out the mind and its deeds then eventually what Buddhist principle: everything that happens to you comes from what you do. It's all made from the mind.
"Resulting retributions come from the karma you create." --Avatamsaka sutra.
"Sangha" is a Sanskrit word meaning "harmoniously united assembly." It is the community of Buddhist monks and nuns who live together without fighting or dissension. The Sangha is a pure field of blessings for gods and humans because of its members cast vows and impeccable precepts. They shine like the bright, full moon in an autumn's sky. The Sangha specializes in taking a loss: they give away their blessings to those with few of their own, they take on suffering to reduce suffering all around. They ear one meal a day to feed the hungry. They wear tattered, plain clothes to clothe those who are short. By not holding personal wealth they give to the poor, and without money their thoughts stay pure.
Treating all beings levelly and equally, the monks and nuns travel lightly through the world, unattached and homeless, free and light at heart. Seeking nothing, creating no problems, always patient, knowing true peace. Content with what comes they are naturally happy and their minds not clogged with longing worries.
"No karma and no affliction,
Without possessions and without a home,
They neither illumine nor practice anything.
In level equality they travel through
The world."
Avatamsaka sutra
A car full of young men sucking beers skids its tires to a stop inches from my head as I bow.
"Hey, where were you guys? We've been looking for you all week-end", says one with a mischievous grin. A round of smothered giggles and laugh rings our in the car.
These are the young men who have been throwing rocks and fruit at out car at night and "playing chicken" with us during the rainstorm. They looked so afraid behind their beer bottles and young faces I couldn't find it in myself to get angry or upright. I wanted to say, "What are you so afraid of?"
Heng Sure and I felt that our fiercest enemies on the road actually are those people closest to us. Those who try to force the biggest gulf between themselves and us by put-down, anger, ridicule and threats actually feel a common bond, it is just because they feel so close that they need to make such a show of distancing. Why? Left-home people stand for then emptiness of dharmas. They embody the principles that worldly happiness is suffering, and true freedom is non-attachment and seeing through the play we call life.
Their fear is in sensing the truth of no self, but not being able to face it squarely. And so everything gets a little "off," and a nervous kind of energy breathes down their necks. They become stiff and critical, always testing for weak spots, rebels without a cause. They feel like,
"I'm a stranger and afraid
in a world I never made."
If you can turn this energy and pressure around and illumine within, it's the fuel for enlightenment. If you can't, this fire spills out into fighting yourself and fighting your own nature until you burn out.
The bodhisattva further reflects,
All beings distinguish self and others and mutually harm each other. Fighting, conflict, anger and hatred blaze on without cease. I should cause them all to dwell in unsurpassed great kindness." --Avatamsaka sutra Ten grounds chapter second ground.
We knew where these men were at, and I think they know where we were, too. They sat in their cars watching us bow, beers clutched in hands. There was no traffic, just a light breeze off the ocean blowing through the quiet emptiness. Face to face, no one could get angry or throw rocks, and seeing their thinly covered pain and insecurity we couldn't feel afraid or rejecting of them.
Finally the leader broke the silence,
"Well, we're going to get stoned out of our minds and watch you for the next forty miles. Toot-a -loo." And off they drove.
Dark rain clouds all around, but a patch of blue above keeps us dry. A Cambria resident stopped to say,
"I admire you perseverance and I finally got a chance to stop and wish you luck."